You’re in your 40s. You’re not quite old. You’re not quite young. You’re not sure what’s happening—but something is.

Your periods are suddenly erratic. Your sleep gets patchy and you’re lying awake at 2 AM, thinking about every mistake you’ve ever made. You feel hot, sad, invisible, and confused. You snap at people you love and then wonder, Was that really me? 

Everyone told you to expect menopause—eventually. But no one warned you about this strange, in-between stage. Somewhere between your late 30s and early 50s, your body begins changing—but no one gives you a name for what’s happening.

Welcome to perimenopause: the silent, messy middle that almost no one prepares Indian women for. And no, you’re not going crazy.

Not Quite Menopause, But No Longer “Normal”

In India, menopause is still whispered about. Perimenopause? Practically unheard of. But it can begin as early as your late 30s and last for anywhere from 2 to 10 years before menopause fully arrives. And yet, in our culture, it’s treated like a footnote—if it’s mentioned at all. And while the physical symptoms—hot flashes, sleep changes, irregular cycles—get the little attention they do, the emotional ones are often ignored altogether:

• Sudden mood swings that feel disproportionate and scary
• Anxiety or depression creeping in for the first time
• Heavy, erratic periods or sudden floods
• Brain fog, low libido, forgetfulness, and broken sleep
• A sense of detachment from your own body
• Grief, even rage, about aging or feeling invisible
• A deep, inexplicable sadness—like something is slipping away
  

You might wonder: Is this depression? Burnout? Am I just overwhelmed with life?

And yes—you might be. But hormonal shifts could be amplifying everything. It’s a lot. And it doesn’t help that we’re told to just “power through”.

And because most doctors don’t bring it up, and aunties rarely talk about it, you begin to question your sanity. You blame your work stress, your family, your own “lack of willpower.”

But the truth is, your hormones are shifting dramatically. And you deserve care and understanding—not shame or silence.

The Emotional Grief of Aging in a Youth-Obsessed Culture

In India, women are often celebrated when they’re young, fertile, and self-sacrificing. But once your body no longer fits those roles, society quietly turns away.

You may feel:

• Frustration: The changes in your body can feel sudden and out of control.
• Sadness or grief: The awareness that your fertility is coming to an end can bring up a sense of loss.
• Confusion: The lack of clarity about what’s happening to your body may leave you questioning your physical and emotional well-being.
• Anxiety: The unknowns of perimenopause—combined with the emotional ups and downs—can trigger feelings of anxiety about what’s to come.
• Anger or irritability: The hormonal changes can leave you feeling unbalanced, often causing irritability and mood swings.
• Left behind or left out: You may feel like you’re invisible in a room you used to command, out of touch with your younger peers or coworkers, less desired by your partner, or like your relevance is fading
  

For many women, perimenopause marks a phase of uncertainty and emotional complexity. You might not recognize yourself—physically or emotionally—and that can feel isolating and overwhelming. It’s painful. It’s real. And you don’t have to carry it alone.

Why Perimenopause Needs to Be Talked About

In India, the lack of open conversation around perimenopause can make it even more difficult to navigate. There is little support for the emotional side of this transition. Many women are expected to go through it in silence, often feeling as though they should simply “accept it” without understanding the emotional implications.

The truth is, perimenopause is a significant life transition, and ignoring its emotional impact can lead to long-term mental health challenges. The physical symptoms, such as hot flashes or sleep disturbances, are often the main focus, but the emotional toll can be just as disruptive.

Why Counseling Is Crucial in Perimenopause

At Paloma Care, we understand that perimenopause is as much an emotional shift as a physical one. It’s a threshold—a shedding, a reckoning, and ultimately, a chance to reclaim yourself.

Our counselors can help you:

• Unpack the emotional rollercoaster in a safe space and name what’s happening in your body and mind
• Cope with mood changes, anxiety, and fatigue using tools that work
• Work through grief, rage, and fear without shame
• Reimagine your identity beyond roles and age, while exploring new ways to define beauty, worth, and self-trust
• Rebuild emotional resilience and anchor into who you’re becoming

This isn’t the end of vitality. But it’s the end of being dismissed. It’s a powerful re-entry into yourself—with guidance.

Don’t Suffer in Silence. You’re Not Alone.

You’re not broken. You’re not weak. You’re transforming. And it doesn’t have to feel this hard.

Talk to a Paloma Care specialist who specializes in midlife transitions and understands the full story of perimenopause, beyond hormones and into the heart. You deserve support for this season—on your terms.